My workplace is gorgeous. I must share pics from over the years.
I realize it's only pics of the backyard. Here's the front
I can't really think of what to write about..so I figure I'll go through all the emotions of my being right now:
Sad: Seeing people my age on Facebook with children and what appears to be 'happy perfect lives' kills me inside. I want that so bad. I'm sorry that I don't get on Facebook that often, but I don't have shame in admitting that it can be emotionally unhealthy for me.
Anger: This whole Stanford rape case is so upsetting. I could barely make it through reading her letter. I have absolutely no idea what it's like to be abused in that way, but I am livid for her. Should she have been drinking to the point of blacking out? Of course not. Did her drunkenness and immodesty give that man the right to attack her? Absolutely not. I could write more, but I honestly don't want to give that man any more attention than the media is already giving him.
Stress: My new position is only 30 hours. I accepted a second job as a pet sitter for my town, but my new boss keeps putting off sits, which means I've gone two weeks not getting what I was expected. I am stressed that I will have to start over and find another second job, even though if this works out the way it's supposed to then I will be super happy.
Surprised: My cat fell into the shower today.
Calm: I love my house. I love my sun room and I love my living room and I love my bedroom. I love coming home after work and curling up in front of the TV, and enjoying those few minutes of being calm between anxious thoughts. I love Saturdays and just being able to calmly lay down and do nothing. I enjoy being a bump on a log sometimes. Somedays I just need and want to do absolutely nothing at all, and that's ok.
Happy: I am truly blessed. I have my dream job, an amazing church (in one of the most liberal parts of the country), a family who loves me, amazing friends who encourage me, and above all else I have God. I remember when I was in 4th grade, I heard someone speak at chapel who 'warned' us of the percentage of people who turn away from God (or something) in adulthood. I went home and I remember in my perfect little 10 year old brain thinking 'Ha, I would never turn away from God! Not even if I was given a life like Job!' I then prayed a prayer that night along the lines of 'bring it on, I will never turn away from God no matter how hard my life is.' Well I wish I could go slap that 10 year old across the face because I'm pretty sure God said 'alright game on'. But throughout my pain, anguish, depression, anxiety, and constantly asking God, 'why did you do this to me', I am still proud to say that I am a child of God. And that prayer that I prayed still stands true to this day. So, sure, bring it on.
That was actually pretty interesting writing out all of that. I literally went through the emotions as I wrote. Cool. I don't want to end on a 'aww' note so here is a comic of me at night.
-Jo










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